as you probably figured out you are not alone. there are many of us the same the black sheep of the family. this happened to me more recently as i woke up totally in 2-19 when covid started. it awakened me quickly and everything i always thought was wrong ? was.. mind blowing. i kept my mouth shut for so many years cause who can you say anything to when they dont see the same thing. at that time i didnt understand it all. it just was what i saw what i felt in my gut but not the origin. thats when 2019 happened. the landslide of all of my life fell into place. things that happened to me helped me see what was going on as it had happened to me on a smaller scale of course.. identical stuff in how i was treated against the deep state but it didnt have a name then.. your in a good place. i love it here. we really are ONE if you want it..