I'm sharing something I wouldn't share anywhere else...
I have been through a lot in my life, big and small adventures, done good things and sometimes bad things, I have tried to save people and to bring happiness and prosperity to others.
I never felt sad about things I did... I had no tears when I was 17 years old and my impressive father suddenly died.
But now I feel the need to feel the tears flowing for once in my life... and then be ready for the next step...
Strange feeling.
Sorry.

We all store feelings inside - until we can't hold back the tears any longer. Maybe something triggered the memory of your father's death. That was a traumatic time for you. Go easy on yourself.