Here's what it does mean. It means his heart and soul are in tremendous pain as are mine still. He's hurting and he's disappointed but that Catholic faith he held onto his entire life made him a leader in his own heart and soul. He will do what is right, even if he needs to give up his own life for Jesus. I still love and admire all Catholics who even though they're in great pain from the realities they have had to face and the disappointments they feel . . . They still have the strength to fight evil wherever it exists . . . Even if it's in the Church we clung to in the storms in our life. It's really hard. I applaud him.
I feel that the words in the Bible that say "Come out of her my people . . . " in Revelations is talking about Mystery Babylon which is the Vatican/Church. Once your eyes are opened you must leave and not be a part of the evil. Rev 17 and 18 describe the Church in every way.
It took me most of my life to see. Once I did, I listened to the Word of GOD.