Confession:
I went quiet on you guys, I walled off and shut you out and for that I'm sorry. 😔 I convinced myself no one cares anyways. I have struggled for a long time now with PTSD, anxiety and depression. You wouldn't even know it because I hide it so well 😅 I have lied and said I'm happy when I'm not so I didn't have to feel isolated. It's a constant internal battle to be honest about when I'm in pain because in the past it's been met with abandonment. I learned to perform so I wouldn't be alone. Even if I was in anguish inside you'd never know on the outside because I bury it. Even now as I type this I can feel that same fear that people will stop talking to me because I'm not posting only good things. I'm sorry I'm so fearful about sharing my negative emotions.

You are beautiful and you say so much that has been on my mind too. The strongest people are often the ones hiding behind a smile and feeling deeply so much in their life. You deserve the best and the lesson I am focused on is this year is "Letting Go". I am letting go of pain, doubt, ending the struggle of not feeling good enough.
Put Hope and Life back in my day and seek God first. Your honesty is more healing so keep it real. You got this and we are here for you!!!

This made me tear up reading, it's such a goid feeling to be understood, and I don't need to hide it anymore if I don't want to. I too will work more on letting go and pouring all the good things in! Thank you for taking the time to talk to me it means alot! 🤍

Perhaps we were separated at birth. This is the year to give it all you got. I totally understand and go through the same struggles. I am here for you always.