Struggling today. All of my sleep walking family who voted for Joey B, all living in la la land, all jabbed and happy as clams seem to have the funds to vacation right now. I am getting a ton of photos in my text messages. All smiling and happy. Since my 6 year Awakening I honestly have not had much to smile about. Don't get me wrong, I have a grateful heart and I certainly would not do anything but work for GOD right now. I am happy that they are all looking very healthy and happy. I want that for them. I am also very grateful for the blessings that I have. I am just in a really strange mood. I don't like living in this alternate reality. I know I need to focus on the results of our time and work. I only wish they were more visible to me. I have to just accept that in life when you feel like you are on the Titanic, there will always be people who dance the night away, having fun until the last second and then there will be people trying to wake people up in the lower cabins.